Death lost it's threat

After I lost you
death lost its threat

I am not rushing toward it.
I am not done here.

But I am not scared anymore.

Because the worst pain
already found me,

Because the person I am waiting for
is on the other side if it.

That changes things.

Living feels heavier.
Dying feels less unknown.

Love does that.
It rearranges your fear.

St. Suzanna Festival

Went to the St. Suzanna Festival with Chad, Christ, Chase, Chloe and Charlotte.
Had Goetta sliders that were very good. Goetta is German-inspired meat-and-grain breakfast sausage or mush that is a beloved regional staple in the Greater Cincinnati.

Christy worked at the beer stand, Chloe and Charlotte worked at the candy booth while Chad & Chase worked at the Goetta stand.

Trip to Ohio

Flying from Sanford to Cincinnati for 2 weeks.

Celebrating America paint theme

Planned to eat here before the flight all week. No flights out of Terminal B so the restaurant was not open. May have to stop at their downtown restaurant on the way home, 

'

With the sun to the west, I watched this sun spot for quite a while. I know it is only the sun rays going through the clouds but it made me think Jeni was watching over me.

 

Nice view from the window

At 61 years old, this is the 1st time I have had a drink on a flight.

Flight to Ohio

Packing the last few items for my trip to Ohio. Will be staying with Chad & Christy for 2 weeks.

Next Saturday is the Dayton Air Force Marathon and the next Saturday Chad has tickets to see Ohio State vs Kent State.

In between there are Church Cekebrations, multiple volleyball games for Chloe and Charlotte.

Chase has his homecoming football game and then the homecoming dance.

Sounds like a packed 2 weeks.

I make these plans, and I as it gets closer to time to go, the less I want to go.

Not just to Ohio, it was the same when I went to Daytona Beach a few weeks ago. It makes me very anxious.

9:30 and basically uready to go.
Just need to turn off the water, lock the cabinets, and take the trash out. I do not need to be at the airport until 2:45. Sitting here with nothing to really do. Those times are the worst emotionally.

I have already taken my anxiety medicine, had 1 for breakfast. Packing them in my personal item for the flight so that I can get them if needed.

Peanuts Bowl

Somehow one of Jeni's Peanuts bowls somehow cracked in the cabinet. Not sure if I was moving things around and it got squeezed between something. A set of 3 is now a sett of 2.

I will miss you forever

I'm sorry I cry all the time, I'm sorry I have a hard time laughing or smiling, I'm sorry cause you made me so happy and I know you wouldn't want me to be this sad.

Please know my sweet love I am trying. But it's so hard without you here, I miss my best friend the one who was my other half. I miss how complete I felt with you. I miss the future we should have had.

I miss everything, I love you...

I will miss you forever...

Wood Carvings

Found two wood carved items in the center console of Jeni's car today.
The one that looks like an Owl has Buddy Overby's initials on it, the other one I am not sure about.

Flowers

 Flowers at Silver Springs State Park

Silver Springs State Park

Was really missing you today and yesterday.
Wish you could be here to walk around the  park with me.
I took a walk around Silver Springs State Park.

Ohio State Football and Amaretto Sours

Ohio State football and amaretto sour x2